Down the Road, the Sun is Shining

I’m a pessimistic person by nature. A Negative Nancy. A Debbie Downer, if you will. I often have to remind myself of the little ways in which I am totally rich and blessed: I have a husband who loves me unconditionally, a house to live in, a job, a car to drive, a beautiful, happy, healthy, funny baby boy. Yet, I often find myself confronted with anxiety or depression or just simple disappointment that I haven’t accomplished everything I’ve wanted to in the time I wanted to.I went back onto Liberating Working Moms and saw the post where we all shared our New Year’s resolutions. I’m not gonna lie. I kind of threw my list together last minute. All of them were items I fully intended on addressing, but my heart really wasn’t in them at the time. The only resolution on that list that I have kept is probably the most important one: to play with my son daily. All the other ones, in some ways, I have failed.One of my dear friends, Laura-Jean, decided upon the arrival of her third and final (so she says—not many of us believe her) sons that she would sit down and write a goal timelinefor herself.Because if anyone deserves to put herself first now, it’s her. I mean, she won’t put herself first. Technically. Her handsome young men will still be educated, loved, played with, entertained, cooked for, and her husband will still have a saint of a wife to keep their home as perfectly organized and smoothly running as only she can, as she accomplishes her goals. But she’s making herdesires and passions a priority. And for that, I salute her.I decided instead of making lofty long-term goals and dates I MUST stick to—because I know I’ll become Negative Nancy if they don’t happen according to plan and get down on myself if I’m at fault for letting a goal fall by the wayside—I decided to make a list of things I’m looking forward to in JUST the next four months. That way, when I become pessimistic about all of the items on my to-do list for each week, when I miss my son while I’m at work, when I have doubts about my future, when I get stressed out at work, I can remember these little pieces of sunshine that will greet me soon enough.

MARCH 2012

Things I Look Forward To:

1.              Going on a lunch date and to see The Hunger Games with Jimmy- We both read and enjoyed this trilogy. We’ve gone to dinner and a movie ONCE since Will was born. It’s overdue.

2.              Seeing Matthew and Caroline!!!- Our best man and his lovely wife will be visiting from Asheville. Even if we only see them for a day, it’s worth it. They are two of the most beautiful people I know.

3.              Participating in my first MLB Fantasy Draft on March 31- nervous, but so, so, so excited about this. And determined NOT to be the quintessential girl.

Goals:
1.              Write one new short story

2.       Finish The Scorpio Races– I don’t read as much as I used to. I started this one over Christmas break, put it down, picked it up, put it down. I just re-started it last week and I will keep reading until I’m finished, even if it’s only a couple pages a day.

APRIL 2012

Things I Look Forward To:

1.              Spring Break- just me and my boy ❤

2.      Major League Baseball starting!!! April 13–Braves home opener!!!3.             Will’s first birthday party!!! <–event of the century, people!

4.             Jimmy’s graduation-Master’s Degree, baby!

(I just realized that April is going to be a pretty badass month.)

Goals:

1.              Compile milestone pictures and create Will’s first year scrapbook

2.              Take Will to one new place and try one new craft over Spring Break

3.              Start reading a new book, preferably on my Kindle

MAY 2012

Things I Look Forward To:

1.              Turning 26 (not really… that sounds too close to 30, but it’s an excuse to eat cake)

2.              Celebrating Mother’s Day

3.              Seeing the Braves at the Trop!!! />/>/>

Goals:

1.              Organize all educational materials from my classroom at the end of the year

2.              Get to the stadium EARLY to see batting practice when the Braves play the Rays

JUNE 2012

Things I Look Forward To:1.              Summer off!

2.              Celebrating my 4thwedding anniversary with my love

3.              Seeing COLDPLAY live in concert!

Goals:

1.              Write DAILY

2.              Use Rosetta Stone or Little Pim (haven’t decided which to buy yet) to learn Spanish FLUENTLY… No seriously. This NEEDS to happen this year. No excuses.

3.              Work out… Also NEEDS to happen.

4.              Look for an online teaching position to relieve some of the stresses of working outside the home and to be more available to my son

5.              Contact advisor at University of Tampa, University of South Florida and University of Central Florida regarding applications for MFA in Creative Writing

6.              Study for the GRE if necessary

7.              Get new glasses 🙂

8.      Enroll Will in swimming classes!

Before I wrote this, I didn’t realize how much I had to be positive about in the next four months. I think this is a good start.

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